Monday Night War week 9

Hosted by Eric Bischoff, Bobby “The Brain” Heenan, and Steve “Mongo” McMichael

“You Call The Shots” as WCW wants you, the viewer, to choose tonight’s main event. Members from the red (heel) locker room are as follows:

“Nature Boy” Ric Flair
Meng
DDP
Lord Steven Regal
“Beautiful” Bobby Eaton
Big Bubba Rogers
Shark
Scott Norton

Sting
Johnny B. Badd
“Hacksaw” Jim Duggan
Evad Sullivan
“Das Wunderkind” Alex Wright
Brian Knobbs
Jerry Sags
Mr. JL

According to Eric the doctors won’t clear Savage to wrestle tonight yet Savage wants a piece of Luger REAL BAD.

Match 1 for the WCW World title?: The Giant (supposedly champion w/ Jimmy Hart) versus Cobra

Last week we had Pittman so this week we have Cobra. Hail to the troops!
The Giant picked up ring announcer David Penzer in order to intimidate him into saying that the match was a title match. Eric disagreed.
Chokeslam
1-2-3.

“Mean” Gene Okerlund is in the red locker room. The main highlight is seeing Eaton sip tea with his pinky in the air. HA!

Meanwhile Tony (I now work on Mondays?) Schiavone is in the blue locker room. Sting wants “the Nature Boy BAD” as the signal gets distorted.

World War III will be on November 26 only on PPV! Catch the 60-man battle royal!

Hulk Hogan and Randy Savage are in Venice Beach, CA sitting alongside either a drunk or a homeless man. I think their “brother” made more sense than they did. This was AWFUL!

The bookerman got a match on Nitro. Whoopee!
Failed prospect the Renegade was his opponent.
Three clotheslines put the Taskmaster down each time. A fourth one sent him over the top rope to the floor.
The extremely agile Renegade hopped over the top rope and landed on his feet on the floor.
Hart distracted him so the Taskmaster levelled him from behind.
The Taskmaster crotched Renegade on the steel railing then clotheslined him to the floor. OUCH!
He then rammed the Renegade twice into the steel steps.
Double stomp from the second turnbuckle by the Taskmaster.
Knee lift.
While Hart laughed at the Renegade, the Taskmaster rammed him into the top turnbuckle.
Taskmaster tried a springboard senton (believe it or not) but hit knees.
Powerslam by the Renegade.
Handspring elbow by the Renegade.
Renegade went for the high knee in the corner, missed, and tied himself to the Tree of Woe.
Taskmaster nailed him in the gut, mounted the second turnbuckle, and delivered the double stomp.
1-2-3.

Summary: When the bookerman pencils himself over you on TV your career isn’t going in the right direction.

After the match Hart gets in the ring and throws a beverage into Renegade’s face. After wiping the face paint off Renegade’s face Hart refers to him as “plain old Rick” and demoralizes him. Considering the fate of Rick Wilson this was scarring and shameful. RIP Rick.

Back in the red locker room Gene badmouths Art Modell for moving the Browns to Baltimore while Regal sports a monocle. HA! The lights flicker as Ric Flair acts like a pro by continuing to cut a promo on Sting. Gotta love live TV!

On WCW Saturday Night “The Enforcer” Arn Anderson will face Kurasawa (aired 11/11, taped 10/25).Disco Inferno’s “hit” video will be shown, and “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan will be in action.

Back elbow by Benoit.
Snap suplex.
Belly-to-back suplex.
Dominator into the Liontamer.
Meanwhile Sonny Onoo, Masahiro Chono, Masa Saito, Kensuke Sasaki, and Jushin “Thunder” Liger sit at a table at ringside. Sushi, anyone?
Guerrero countered a powerbomb attempt with an arm drag.
Tilt-a-whirl slam.
Flying back elbow.
After Benoit took a powder Guerrero delivered a springboard plancha from the top rope to the aisle. Someone call the authorities! I spotted a UFO!
Back in the ring Guerrero delivered a brainbuster.
He then mounted the top turnbuckle but got caught.
Superplex by Benoit.
Wild bomb.
Short-arm clothesline.
Victory roll by Guerrero.
German suplex with a bridge by Benoit.
Northern lights suplex.
Benoit attempted the dragon suplex, but Guerrero made the ropes.
Benoit draped Guerrero across the top rope.
They each block a suplex attempt then Benoit tried to give Guerrero a belly-to-back suplex from the apron into the ring. However, Guerrero used momentum, landed on top of Benoit, and got the pin.
Benoit’s feet were under the bottom rope, but referee Randy Eller didn’t see it.

Summary: When two wrestlers can create a story just by stringing their moves together, you get a fantastic match like this one. Unfortunately neither Heenan nor the crowd was hip to the room with this match as this was legendary stuff for 1995. Check it out while you can!

Back in the blue locker room Tony shills the number to call to book the main event. Sting is FUCKING LIVID with Flair. I wonder if ANYBODY wanted to see Evad Sullivan (w/ bunny) against Mr. JL.

Promotional consideration paid for by Slim Jim featuring “Macho Man’ Randy Savage. Also the video cassette of WCW Fall Brawl 1995 will be available tomorrow (11/7/1995) in video stores everywhere!

Eric notifies us that Sting will face Flair tonight in the main event while Heenan drinks sake.

Interestingly Flair came to the ring sans robe or Horsemen.
Gorilla press slam.
10-punch count-along.
Flair flip but Sting nailed him with a clothesline sending him from the apron to the floor.
Sting then made Flair eat the steel railing. It must have tasted like Gorgonzola sirloin at Millhouse.
Make that twice. Flair must have saved room for the crème-Brule cheesecake.
Vertical suplex on the floor by Flair.
After Flair backed up to the steel railing Sting attempted a Stinger splash only to eat it himself. Waiter, get the seafood Chioppino pasta for the Stinger please.
According to Eric during the commercial break Flair hit a long field goal on Sting if you know what I mean.
Belly-to-back suplex by Flair.
Figure-four leg lock with classic cheating by Flair. Referee Randy Anderson didn’t see Flair grabbing the ropes.
Sting reversed the hold.
Gorilla press slam #2 by Sting.
Dropkick.
After tossing Sting outside the ring Flair hit a double axe handle from the apron to the floor.
Flair tried to pin Sting with his feet on the ropes.
Backslide by Sting got 2.
Flair tried to mount the top turnbuckle but got caught and tossed down to the canvas.
Anderson tried to step in between Sting and Flair so Sting propped him up on the opposite turnbuckle.
Meanwhile Flair got some brass knuckles from his trunks.
One right to the mush and Sting was down and out.
Elbow drop only got 2.
Gorilla press slam #3 by Sting.
Top rope superplex.
Scorpion death lock.
Flair submitted.

Summary: If PBS ever produced a special on WCW they’d have to use Masterpiece Theater for Sting and Flair. These guys never have a boring match together.

After the match Sting maintains the hold as referees Eller and Patrick run in to help remove Flair from the grasp of Sting. Eric then SAYS he sees Luger coming to the ring, but the “Total Package” is nowhere to be seen on camera. Bartender, I’ll have what he’s having.

Mr. JL and Eddie Guerrero run in to break it up and Luger still hasn’t shown up. In the meantime Evad uses rabbit persuasion to try to convince Sting to release the hold. Lo and behold Duggan comes into the ring, and Sting breaks the hold.

Sting runs back into the ring to attack Flair when Luger FINALLY shows up. While Sting has Flair in the Scorpion death lock again Luger alarms him of the falling profits of Main Event Fitness to get his full attention. Amazingly Sting follows Luger back to the dressing room.

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT (as promised by Eric): Back in the ring Gene interviews the Giant who has the Taskmaster and Jimmy Hart with him. Using his power of attorney Hart inserted a clause into the contract for the World title match at Halloween Havoc stating that if Hogan got disqualified he would lose the World title. By proxy the Giant is the World champion.

Nick Lambros, Junior VP of WCW, enters the ring and notifies us that the Giant is NOT the World champion. According to WCW Commissioner Nick Bockwinkel the title will be held up and contested in the 60-man battle royal at World War III. To no one’s surprise the Taskmaster besmirches Lambros and hails the Giant as the favorite to win the battle royal.

Next week Savage will face Meng, and Eddie Guerrero will face the new World television champion Johnny B. Badd. Lastly, Sting will face Dean Malenko. But I wonder…WCW is pretty certain of the matches scheduled for next week. I’ll bet that the show is already in the can. You’ll have to stay tuned for my next report to find out.

Conclusion: Much better effort from WCW in the wrestling department this week. This is a must-see episode for wrestling fans.

Now let’s discuss that “special announcement.” Hulk Hogan, who had been the face of WCW for the past year, was in contract negotiations with WCW by this point in time. WCW, not wanting to besmirch Hogan in any way whatsoever, didn’t ask Hogan to drop the belt (nefariously or legitimately) prior to the fulfillment of his contract. So, in order to save face for both WCW and Hogan, they created a loophole to remove the title from him. Like it or not, THAT’S called stroke.

We open with the replay of the SLAM HEARD ‘ROUND THE WORLD by Ahmed Johnson. Lex who?

Match 1: Marty Jannetty versus “the British Bulldog” Davey Boy Smith (w/ Jim Cornette)

Week 3 of the taping = match#3 for Marty Jannetty
Enziguri by Jannetty.
By the way, if tassels are your thing, then THIS is your match.
Meanwhile Bulldog presses Jannetty overhead only to drop him on the top rope.
During the match Clarence Mason stated that Smith will face the WWF champion at IYH 5. Nice work, counselor.
Delayed vertical suplex by Smith.
Crucifix by Jannetty got 2.
Clothesline by Smith sold by Jannetty with a 360° flip. Woohoo!
Leg drop by Smith.
After Jannetty got tossed outside the ring Cornette kicked him. David Crockett would be proud.
After receiving a cross-corner whip Smith evaded a charging Jannetty who tied himself to the Tree of Woe.
After mounting the second turnbuckle Jannetty delivered a somersault bulldog.
Flying back elbow.
Jannetty mounted the top turnbuckle, leaped in anticipation for the fist drop, noticed Smith had moved, and landed on his feet.
He then delivered a DDT.
Foot on the ropes saved Smith.
Blind charge by Jannetty resulted in the ramming of his shoulder into the ring post.
Running powerslam.
1-2-3.

Summary: Purposefully I ignored the numerous chin locks applied by Smith during the match. One can see flashes of the heel character that he became later on, but he was still a work-in-progress here.

The Bill Clinton impersonator makes a pre-recorded promo for Survivor Series at the Washington Monument.

Smith and Cornette appear happy about the main event of IYH 5. Cornette then hypes the wild card match at Survivor Series.

Back in the locker room Barry Horowitz gives speech #462 from the coaches’ handbook to both Hakushi and Bret Hart in preparation for the main event.

On Superstars Lawler interviews Goldust. During the interview Bam Bam Bigelow interrupts and challenges Goldust to a match. It will take place at Survivor Series.

GORE! GORE! GORE! Oh, wait! Terry Richards hadn’t yet transformed into Rhino.
Elbow drop by Godwinn.
He then used Rhino’s Richards’ head as a battering ram into the top turnbuckle.
Guillotine leg drop on the bottom rope.
Slop drop.
1-2-3.

Summary: Truly the only highlight was seeing the pre-ECW Rhino in jobber mode here.

After the match Helmsley attacks Godwinn from behind. He then gave him a pedigree on the floor. After putting on gloves he grabs the slop and drops it on Godwinn. Nice touch with the gloves. These two will face one another next week.

Emanating from Washington, DC Landover, MD on November 19 Survivor Series is only on PPV!
On WWF Mania King Mabel challenged the Undertaker. The eight-man tag match will pit the team of the Dark Side which includes the Undertaker, Fatu, Henry Godwinn, and Savio Vega against the team of the Royals (not the one from Kansas City) which includes King Mabel, Jerry “The King” Lawler, Hunter Hearst Helmsley, and Isaac Yankem.
Pre-recorded promo by Paul Bearer and the Undertaker. Undertaker’s face was not revealed.
Todd hypes the main event then Diesel cuts a promo on Bret. He also hypes a face-to-face interview with both Diesel and Bret.

Barry Didinsky shills 1000 mad caps for only $21. This must have been a 90s thing. Back then the only caps I had came off the top of my Miller High Life.

On the Superstar line Razor Ramon describes his title match next week against Sycho Sid. Something tells me he didn’t defend the title twice in one taping cycle. Stay tuned for my next report to find out!

While Tony Roy tried to pull off the incredible upset Shawn Michaels called in so that we wouldn’t change the channel.
After Kama missed a superkick Roy vaulted him over the top rope to the floor.
As Shawn claimed some disorientation Kama levelled Roy with a clothesline in the corner.
Face plant.
Knockout punch got the pin.

Summary: Would you like butter or margarine on your squash? Take your pick ‘cuz this was Kama’s tune-up for the Survivor Series.

Next week the 1-2-3 Kid will be the special referee for the match between Sycho Sid and Ramon. The title can change hands on a disqualification or countout. I smell a cop-out.

Match 4: Jerry “The King” Lawler and Isaac Yankem versus Bret “Hitman” Hart and Hakushi (w/ Barry Horowitz)

Bear hug by Yankem.
Diving head butt from the top rope by Hakushi to Yankem.
Handspring elbow by Hakushi.
Bronco buster.
Inverted atomic drop by Bret followed by a clothesline.
Cross body block by Bret.
Sunset flip from the apron into the ring by Bret got 2.
Handspring elbow #2 by Hakushi thwarted by Yankem with a clothesline to the back of the neck.
Springboard dropkick by Hakushi.
Plancha by Hakushi but Yankem caught him and rammed him back-first into the ring post.
He then rammed Hakushi’s back into the apron.
Backbreaker by Yankem.
Piledriver by Lawler.
Make that 2.
Bear hug by Yankem.
Yankem attempted a big boot, but Hakushi countered with a leg sweep.
Dropkick by Hakushi.
Boston Crab by Yankem.
Lawler mounted the top turnbuckle, attempted a double axe handle, but ate a shot to the throat.
Hot tag Bret.
Bulldog by Bret.
He rammed both Lawler and Yankem’s heads together.
Russian leg sweep.
Elbow drop from the second rope.
Sharpshooter, but Lawler brought a chair into the ring.
Horowitz intercepted it.
Referee Tim White saw Horowitz with the chair and disqualified Hart and Hakushi.

Wednesday (11/8)--Columbus, OH
Friday (11/10)--Uniondale, NY
Saturday (11/11)--Worcester, MA
Sunday (11/12)--East Rutherford, NJ
Following Sunday (11/19)--Landover, MD for Survivor Series

Next week Henry Godwinn faces Hunter Hearst Helmsley. Also, Ramon defends the Intercontinental title against Sycho Sid with the 1-2-3 Kid as special referee. A face-to-face confrontation between Diesel and Bret will be shown. Lastly Ahmed Johnson will be in action.

Previews of next week’s action just to prove that next week’s show is taped.

Conclusion: If there was ever an episode of RAW to skip it’d be this one. P-U! Also, the middle of the show screamed “let’s watch Nitro!” with the two squash matches.

Who won? Not surprising to me as it was the better show this week, but Nitro won with the interactive match. Next week’s shows have some promise. Let’s hope they live up to it.