Hosted by Vince McMahon and Jerry “The King” Lawler
Wearing a bikini Sunny kneels in the surf and informs us that viewer discretion is advised.
Prior to the first match highlights from Superstars are shown featuring the 1-2-3 Kid force-feeding a baby bottle and nailing Ramon with a stroller. Another highlight shows the Kid walloping Ramon with Jarrett’s guitar.
Match 1 (Cry-baby): Razor Ramon versus the 1-2-3 Kid (w/ Ted DiBiase)
Highlights:
Aw…the Kid brought a teddy bear in the ring. He tossed it in Ramon’s face. Hey! That’s not nice! Someone needed a time-out.
Ramon gave the Kid a clothesline sending him over the top rope to the floor.
Springboard clothesline by the Kid from the apron into the ring.
Series of kicks in the corner by the Kid.
Standing leg lariat.
Clothesline in the corner by Ramon.
Fallaway slam.
With the Kid outside the ring DiBiase tossed baby powder in Ramon’s eyes.
The Kid mounted the top turnbuckle and hit a missile dropkick.
Pair of leg drops by the Kid.
Standing dropkick.
He then mounted the top turnbuckle and hit the splash for 2.
Sleeper.
After some miscommunication the Kid hooked a second sleeper.
In order to escape Ramon crotched the Kid on the top rope. YEE-OUCH!
Cross-body block from the top turnbuckle by the Kid but Ramon used momentum to land on top.
Spinning heel kick by the Kid.
Fallaway slam from the second turnbuckle by Ramon. Wow!
DiBiase got up on the apron leaving behind the container of baby powder for the Kid.
As the Kid stalked Ramon from behind “the bad guy” turned around and kicked the powder in Kid’s face.
Razor’s Edge.
1-2-no. Ramon pulled the Kid up.
Razor’s Edge #2.
1-2-3.
Rating: ***1/2
Summary: Really good match that properly utilized the stipulation. Since these two had worked together so often their chemistry was very smooth.
After the match Ramon squirts milk from a baby bottle in the Kid’s face then puts baby powder in his hand for diaper application. DiBiase runs in only to have the powder tossed in his face. Ramon then puts a diaper on the Kid and sprinkles powder in the Kid’s face. The Kid wakes up, notices that he’s wearing a diaper, and begins to cry. Aw, poor Sean, is your heel character not working very well?
Ray Rougeau and Sunny are on the Superstar line. Previously, during the Free for All, Jake “The Snake” Roberts brought his new snake Revelation to the Superstar line area scaring the bejeezus out of Sunny.
Prior to his entrance Droese was interviewed by Todd Pettengill. Highlights of Helmsley’s attack on Droese from Superstars are shown. After delivering a Pedigree Helmsley cuts Droese’s hair. The scoundrel! Droese states that it’s “payback time.”
Match 2: Duke “The Dumpster” Droese versus Hunter Hearst Helmsley (w/ Elizabeth Hilden)
Helmsley flip after receiving a cross-corner whip.
Military press by Droese.
Big boot.
Ten-punch count-along, but prior to completion Helmsley gave Droese snake-eyes.
Pedigree attempt countered into an inverted atomic drop.
Clothesline.
Helmsley gave Droese a back drop over the top rope to the floor.
He then sent Droese into the steel steps.
Lawler would be proud as a fan held up a “Hello USWA fans” sign.
Knee drop by Helmsley.
High knee.
Vertical suplex.
Double clothesline.
You could hear a pin drop in the arena.
Spinebuster by Droese. Impressive!
Powerslam.
Trash compactor.
Droese left the ring, grabbed his metal trash can, and tossed it in the ring.
While referee Mike Chioda removed the can from the ring Helmsley demolished the lid across Droese’s head.
1-2-3.
Rating: *
Summary: Helmsley’s push continues. Moving along.
Call 1-800-TITAN-91 to access the WWF Store. Vince gets a dig in at Yokozuna regarding clothing size.
Highlights from RAW of Yokozuna’s loss to Michaels and the aftermath are shown.
Backstage Dok Hendrix interviews Yokozuna who surprisingly can speak English very well. He badmouths Cornette, Owen, and Smith. Hendrix warns us of the upcoming train-wreck. Insert your own joke here.
Match 3: The “British Bulldog” Davey Boy Smith (w/ Jim Cornette) versus Yokozuna
Highlights:
Pair of clotheslines by Yokozuna.
After a slam Yokozuna missed an elbow drop.
Clothesline by Smith.
With Smith distracted referee Jack Doan Cornette nailed Yokozuna.
Avalanche by Yokozuna. Smith got SQUISHED.
Before Yokozuna can give Smith the bonsai drop Cornette hauled Smith out of the ring.
Outside the ring Yokozuna sent Smith back-first into the ring post.
Avalanche into the ring post missed.
Smith mounted the top turnbuckle and hit a forearm shot.
Again Smith mounted the top turnbuckle but received a shot to the mid-section on the way down.
Three clotheslines by Smith couldn’t knock Yokozuna down.
Samoan drop by Yokozuna.
Belly-to-belly suplex.
Cornette entered the ring and hammered Yokozuna in the back with his tennis racket.
Yokozuna won by DQ.
Rating: *1/2
Summary: In spite of opposing one of Cornette’s men the face turn of Yokozuna doesn’t look too promising. Smith tried his best here with the limited big man.
After the match Cornette smashed his racket again across Yokozuna’s back twice more to zero effect. As Yokozuna stalks Cornette Vader, in street clothes yet wearing his mask, runs in and nails Yokozuna from behind. Smith and Yokozuna double-team Yokozuna until Vader pulls some handcuffs out of his jacket.
As Cornette blocks referee Jack Doan Vader cuffs Yokozuna. Both Smith and Vader pummel the big man until officials chase the heels away. Before that can happen though Yokozuna receives several racket shots from both Cornette and Smith. Clarence Mason talks some sense into Cornette’s men before they get into any more trouble.
Back in the AOL room Goldust sits beside Marlena while hugging the typist. Yikes! He whispers that he will defend his Intercontinental title against Ramon tomorrow night on RAW.
Highlights of Shawn Michaels’ tumultuous times at the end of 1995 are shown. Owen takes full responsibility for knocking Michaels out of competition, but Michaels holds a press conference detailing his involvement in the Royal Rumble. “Mr. Charisma” wins the Rumble then puts his title shot on the line.
Backstage Todd interviews Michaels who is ready for Owen and WrestleMania.
Match 4 (#1 contender spot to the WWF title at stake): The “Heartbreak Kid” Shawn Michaels versus the “Rocket” Owen Hart (w/ Jim Cornette)
Highlights:
Michaels made his entrance atop the house. Using a rope he swung down to the floor.
He then ran into the ring and tossed Owen over the top rope to the floor.
Michaels mounted the top turnbuckle and hit a cross-body block on the floor.
Again he mounted the top turnbuckle and hit a double axe handle.
Both men kipped up simultaneously.
Huracanrana by Michaels.
Awesome belly-to-belly suplex by Owen.
Backbreaker.
Swinging neckbreaker.
Sharpshooter attempt but Michaels blocked it.
Camel clutch by Owen.
Somersault rollup got 2.
Spinning heel kick by Owen.
Instead of Owen suplexing Michaels back into the ring Michaels suplexed Owen outside of it.
Michaels dove from the apron to the floor but got caught with a powerslam.
Owen mounted the top turnbuckle and hit the missile dropkick.
Michaels flip in the corner followed by a clothesline from Owen.
Sharpshooter.
Michaels made it to the ropes.
Enziguri but Michaels fell outside the ring.
After rolling Michaels back into the ring Owen only got a 2 count.
Owen missed a monkey flip attempt in the corner then ate an inverted atomic drop.
Clothesline by Michaels.
Forearm.
Michaels mounted the top turnbuckle and hit the big elbow.
Cornette got up on the apron but got nailed.
Michaels missed Sweet Chin Music.
Owen missed another enziguri.
Michaels didn’t miss Sweet Chin Music #2 though.
1-2-3.
Rating:*****
Summary: Encore! Encore! Give me more! Awesome match that should have occurred more often in WWF/E history. Michaels retains his #1 contender spot for WrestleMania.
After the match a young female fan dances with Michaels in the ring.
Promo for WrestleMania XII on March 31 only on PPV.
While the cage is being erected Todd stands on a platform and interviews interim WWF President “Rowdy” Roddy Piper. He proclaims Michaels the #1 contender in the WWF title match at WrestleMania then wishes him luck. Next he addresses Yokozuna and tells him to smarten up. The next topic is Vader who Piper advises not to put his jock strap on his face. BURN! He makes the match between them and inserts “let the blood flow.” Whoa! McMahon had already bitched to WCW about blood and the Tommy Morrison tragedy was still fresh, so this was a misstep by Piper in my eyes.
Cornette and Mason join Piper on the platform. Before Cornette can utter six words Piper tells him to “shut up” then puts his hand over Mason’s mouth. After Piper chastises him Cornette sings Vader’s praises. Piper proposes that if Vader loses then Yokozuna can get his hands on Cornette Finally, Piper finishes his promo by spanking Cornette. Piper is nothing if not unique.
Match 5 for the WWF World title: Bret “Hitman” Hart (champion) versus Diesel
Highlights:
This would be the big blue cage where the winner would be the wrestler who exits the cage with his feet touching the floor.
After badmouthing Bret in the corner (and probably telling him how much money Bischoff offered him) Diesel gave Bret a knee to the mid-section following by a standing choke with his boot.
Bret sent Diesel face-first into the cage after blocking Diesel’s attempt.
Make that trip #2 for Diesel into the cage.
Bret made the first attempt to escape by climbing the cage, but Diesel caught him.
He then carried Bret and rammed him back-first into the cage.
Make that twice.
Diesel tried to escape by going out the door. He got one leg over the top rope then Bret caused him to sing like a soprano if you catch my drift.
Bret scurried halfway out the door with his hands reaching the floor before Diesel grabbed him and brought him back in.
Clothesline by Diesel.
Sidewalk slam.
Elbow drop missed.
While Bret climbed the cage Diesel crawled toward the door. Bret turned around and stopped him.
Another Bret escape attempt thwarted as Diesel tossed Bret from the top rope down to the mat.
Bret mounted the second turnbuckle and hit a bulldog.
After catching Bret trying to escape Diesel gave him a belly-to-back suplex.
Elbow drop.
Diesel missed a knee in the corner.
Diesel reversed a cross-corner whip sending Bret sternum-first to the turnbuckle.
Bret got 75% of the way out of the cage before Diesel grabbed him by the hair.
Diesel then rammed him into the cage.
Again Bret hit sternum-first on a cross-corner whip.
Staggering (as opposed to running) guillotine by Diesel.
Bret escaped a snake eyes attempt and sent Diesel into the cage again.
Sharpshooter attempt but Diesel blocked it.
Side Russian leg sweep by Bret.
Top rope elbow drop by Bret.
Diesel ended another Bret escape attempt with a Flair uppercut. OUCH!
When Diesel tried to exit through the door the Undertaker rips through the canvas from under the ring to grab him.
He then pulled Diesel down with him.
That allowed Bret to climb the cage and exit.
Rating: ***
Summary: Intriguing finish to a good cage match. However, since Bret won the title at Survivor Series he survived a bloodbath with his brother-in-law, kept his title due to interference at the Royal Rumble, and remained champion here due to the Undertaker’s involvement. To say Bret’s title reign has been lackluster would be putting it mildly.
Smoke emits from the hole in the ring as Diesel climbs out petrified. The Undertaker also crawls out as Diesel climbs out of the cage. Eerily the Undertaker points at Diesel from the top of the cage.
Conclusion: While the main event was pretty good the semi-main made the show. In just the first two shows of 1996 Shawn Michaels has become the workhorse in the WWF. I can’t wait to see his match against Bret at WrestleMania. With that being said the rest of the card was mediocre. Definitely check out that Michaels-Owen match when you get the chance and skip the rest.