WCW Great American Bash '91

Let's perform a side project while we progress through this show. What's the project, you ask? Help to pad Rock and Roll Hall of Famer Tom Petty's resume past the pearly gates.

On July 1, WCW Executive Vice-President Jim Herd fired "Nature Boy" Ric Flair due to a contract dispute. Although his services were no longer required, his contract will terminate August 1. WCW also stripped Flair of the WCW World title although, as of this show, Flair remained NWA World champion. While the ads for this show couldn't be replaced, they were altered to change the main event.

To say this was the biggest pro wrestling news story of 1991 would be an understatement. While Flair, as champion, may not have been as lucrative for WCW as it would have hoped, having Flair in the promotion put butts in seats. I understand WCW's attempts to trim its bottom line because it lost six million dollars in 1990. On the other hand, cutting Flair's pay while offering Sid, Luger, and Sting bigger contracts is the worst bit of accounting pre-Enron.

Also, despite the Ding Dongs, Ole Anderson as booker, and silly gimmicks like Big Josh and Black Blood on name wrestlers, this was the worst decision for WCW made by Herd. Without Flair, I shudder to think how the fallout will transpire.

Match 1 (scaffold): “Stunning” Steve Austin & the "Computerized Man of the 1990s" Terrance Taylor (w/ Lady Blossom) versus “Beautiful” Bobby Eaton & the "Rapmaster" PN News

In addition to pushing your opponent off the scaffold, a team can win by capturing the other team's flag. Seriously? What are these guys afraid of?

Now you're getting the hang of it, Tom.
According to Schiavone, Austin was the WCW World TV champion (aired 6/29, taped 6/4).

After Austin achieved his balance, Eaton rammed him face-first into the wooden platform.
News then made his way across the platform and pushed Taylor back into his own end zone.
Meanwhile, Lady Blossom jiggled and screamed down on the floor. Woohoo!
As News fought with Austin in the heel's end zone, Taylor and Eaton brawled in the babyface end zone.
Eaton then made Taylor taste the scaffold railing. It doesn't look like steel so Taylor won't get any crab cakes from me.

With all four wrestlers in the heel end zone, Eaton grabbed the heel's flag.
He then nailed Austin and carried the flag back to his own end zone.
The babyfaces won.

After the match, Austin climbed down the scaffold, and retrieved a can of hair spray from Lady Blossom. He then took it up to the scaffold and blinded the babyfaces. Methinks this was supposed to occur before Eaton captures the flag because ring announcer Gary Michael Cappetta waits an eternity to notify the Baltimore faithful.

As the wrestlers make their way down the ladders, Eaton kicks Taylor down to the mat. All four wrestlers brawl in the ring while News hip-tosses Taylor. The heels then flee. Wow! This show's off to a great start.

To stall while the WCW crew removed the scaffold, Schiavone mentions WCW's "reinstatement" offer which Flair refused back on 7/8. Tom, can you please help us while we wait?

On the ramp, WCW newcomer Eric Bischoff interviews Arn Anderson and Uncle Paul who cut promos on Rick Steiner and Missy Hyatt.

Before the match began, a "studette" ripped off Diamond Studd's pants while Studd flicked his toothpick at the camera.
Z-Man made his entrance with some Baltimore bombshells.
From the ramp, Z-Man flew over the top rope and double-clotheslined Page and Studd.
He then gave Studd a cross corner whip followed by a corner clothesline.
When Z-Man came off the ropes, DDP low-bridged him sending Z-Man down to the floor.
Z-Man then directed his attention toward DDP allowing Studd to nail Z-Man from behind.
Next, Studd whipped Z-Man over the steel railing into the front row.
Studd then leaped from the apron and nailed Z-Man with a double axe handle.
Back in the ring, Z-Man hit a cross body block for 2.
Studd then reversed a cross corner whip and hooked a rope-assisted abdominal stretch.
When referee Nick Patrick caught Studd's shenanigans, Z-Man delivered a hip toss.
Studd then blocked a second hip toss and delivered a chokeslam.
While an arrogant cover earned Studd a 2-count, Z-Man executed a sunset flip for 2.
Studd then clotheslined Z-Man, almost ate another sunset flip, but fed Z-Man a knuckle sandwich. I wonder if it contained horseradish.
When Studd missed a clothesline, Z-Man hit a superkick.
Both wrestlers then fought on the floor as Z-Man made Studd taste the steel railing. It must have tasted like Mike's Meatball sub at One-Eyed Mike's.
He then rammed Studd face-first into the apron, reversed an Irish whip, and sent Studd head-over-heels atop the steel railing.
Back in the ring, Z-Man mounted the top turnbuckle and hit a missile dropkick for 2.
DDP then slapped Z-Man so Z-Man brought him into the ring by the ears and gave him a superkick.
As Studd regained his composure, he hooked a belly-to-back suplex with a bridge.
1-2-3.
Studd won.

Summary: While the Baltimore faithful sought some Old Bay popcorn, this was merely a mediocre match. What's your analysis, Tom?

After a stalemate on a shoulder block challenge, Oz gave Simmons a big boot.
He then gave Simmons a cross corner whip but ate knee on his follow-through.
In the meantime, the Baltimore faithful broke out a "boring" chant. Yikes!
Three clotheslines from Simmons then took Oz over the top rope to the floor.
As Simmons missed a dropkick, Oz hit a clothesline.
He then delivered a sidewalk slam for 2.
When Oz tossed Simmons outside the ring, the Great Wizard put the boots to Simmons. How dastardly!
Simmons then re-entered the ring via sunset flip but ate a double axe handle.
After Oz hooked a bear hug, Simmons escaped and delivered a dropkick.
He then hit a pair of three-point stance tackles and nailed the Great Wizard.
Upon hitting a flying shoulder block, Simmons pinned Oz.

Summary: Pedestrian match where both competitors desperately need more experience. What was that, Tom?

The "Total Package" Lex Luger
Barry Windham
Sting
"Stunning" Steve Austin
"Beautiful" Bobby Eaton
The "Enforcer" Arn Anderson
El Gigante
Diamond Studd
Ron Simmons
Johnny B. Badd

Are you ready for the break-up of the Rock'n'Roll Express? Get your tissues ready!

As Morton made his entrance, Gibson met him on the ramp and brawled with him.
Gibson then gave Morton a cross corner whip, but Morton escaped to the apron.
Next, Gibson brought Morton in the hard way.
Morton then reversed an Irish whip but ate a slam.
After he used momentum to send Gibson face-first into the second turnbuckle, Morton rammed Gibson's previously injured right knee into the ring post and apron.
He then ripped Gibson's tights around the knee brace, attempted a spinning toe hold, but Gibson countered with an inside cradle for 2.
While the Baltimore faithful chanted "Morton sucks," Gibson hooked a sunset flip for 2.
Morton then hooked a figure-four leg lock, but Gibson reversed it.
After he rammed Gibson's knee into the apron, Morton bored the Baltimore faithful (and me) with his psychology.
Out of nowhere, Gibson hit a DDT to wake both the Baltimore faithful and me up.
He then gave Morton a back drop but missed a dropkick.
Upon giving Gibson an inverted atomic drop, Morton mounted the top turnbuckle.
However, Gibson caught and slammed him down to the mat.
He then delivered an enziguri as Morton celebrated with a 360³ sell. Woohoo!
When Morton sought refuge on the ramp, Gibson joined him.
Both wrestlers then attempted a dropkick simultaneously but missed.
As Morton fell off the ramp, York got up on the apron to distract referee Bill Alfonso.
Morton then grabbed the computer, mounted the top turnbuckle, and WALLOPED Gibson.
1-2-3.
Morton won.

Summary: While I understand tag team break-ups occur in wrestling, the Rock'n'Roll Express were the consummate underdogs. Morton, as a heel, did not represent an underdog in this match; therefore, this feud made no sense in execution. Also, while Morton's psychology seemed logical due to Gibson's prior injury, a high-flying, high-workrate match was the expected outcome rather than this dreck.

Backstage, Bischoff interviews the Young Pistols and Rhodes. Poor Rhodes. He's been watching too many of his father's promos.

Match 5 (six-man elimination, non-title): The Young Pistols & the "Natural" Dustin Rhodes versus WCW US tag team champions the Freebirds & Badstreet (w/ Big Daddy Dink)

Interestingly, Badstreet wore a belt to the ring. Upon further review, he represented 1/3 of the WCW World Six-Man tag team champions with the Freebirds. That was truly a Dusty Rhodes title.
As the Baltimore faithful chanted "Freebirds suck," Hayes gave Rhodes a cross corner whip followed by a right hand.
Rhodes then reversed a second cross corner whip and slammed Hayes.
When Garvin came in, Rhodes slammed him too.
He then delivered a pair of consecutive bionic elbows to the Freebirds while Badstreet mounted the top turnbuckle.
After Badstreet leaped and came up empty, Rhodes gave him a bionic elbow.
Rhodes then came off the ropes, but Garvin put a knee into his back. SNEAKY!
Meanwhile, Badstreet came in and clotheslined the Pistols off the apron to the floor.
Rhodes then face-planted both Freebirds while the Pistols mounted opposite top turnbuckles.
Next, they hit consecutive shoulder blocks to the Freebirds sending them scurrying outside the ring.
Garvin tagged in and requested Smothers to tag in.
Unfortunately for Garvin, Smothers reversed a cross corner whip and delivered a back drop and a dropkick.
He then missed a second dropkick but hit a flying back elbow.
Steve tagged in, mounted the top turnbuckle, and hit a lariat to Badstreet.
When Smothers tagged in, he mounted the top turnbuckle and lowered the boom on Hayes.
Garvin tagged in, and Badstreet gave Smothers a low bridge sending him to the floor.
Outside the ring, Badstreet gave Smothers an Irish whip into a Dink clothesline. How nefarious!
While the babyfaces distracted referee Randy Anderson, Badstreet slammed Smothers on the floor.
After Hayes gave Smothers a cross corner whip, Smothers floated to the apron only to eat a left from Hayes. In fact, that shot sent Smothers flying into the steel railing. OUCH!
Garvin then slammed Smothers and hit a knee drop.
As Badstreet tagged in, he gave Smothers a cross corner whip followed by a clothesline.
Hayes tagged in and hooked a sleeper on Smothers.
When Smothers escaped, he reversed a cross corner whip and gave Hayes the ten-punch count-along.
On the other hand, Hayes countered with an inverted atomic drop, but Smothers blocked it.
He then missed a clothesline and ate another left from Hayes.
After Garvin tagged in, he got 2 on Smothers.
The babyfaces then distracted Anderson again so that Badstreet could mount the top turnbuckle and nail Smothers.
Upon giving Smothers a swinging neckbreaker, Badstreet got another 2.
Smothers then hooked a sunset flip but only got 2.
As Hayes tagged in, Smothers attempted to chop him but ate a third left from Hayes.
He then countered a DDT from Hayes and made the lukewarm tag to Steve.
After Steve cleaned house, all six wrestlers were in the ring.
The Pistols then gave Badstreet a double flying shoulder block while Rhodes and Garvin brawled outside the ring.
When Steve tried to remove Badstreet's mask, Hayes clotheslined him.
To the Baltimore faithful's delight, Badstreet and Hayes hit a double DDT on Steve.
1-2-3.
Steve was eliminated as the heels led 3-2.
When Hayes backdropped Smothers over the top rope, Anderson disqualified him.
The sides evened at two apiece.
After Badstreet tagged in, he slammed Smothers, mounted the top turnbuckle, and hit a double axe handle.
Garvin tagged in while Dink distracted Anderson.
Since that created a false tag, Badstreet and Garvin hit a double DDT on Smothers.
1-2-3.
Smothers was eliminated as the heels led 2-1.
When Rhodes entered, he hit a lariat on Garvin.
1-2-3.
The sides evened at one apiece.
Once again, Badstreet mounted the top turnbuckle and delivered a double axe handle.
He then gave Rhodes an elbow drop for 2.
After a slam, Badstreet mounted the top turnbuckle, leaped, but ate a shot to the midsection.
Rhodes then hit another lariat.
In lieu of a pin, Dink distracted Anderson again.
Badstreet then gave Rhodes a cross corner whip, but Rhodes hit the bulldog kicking Dink out of the ring in the process.
1-2-3.
Rhodes survived.

Summary: To energize the Baltimore faithful, this match should have been followed the scaffold match due to the heat it generated. Best match of the show thus far mostly due to Badstreet.

As you might expect, the Dog brought a golden retriever to the ring.
Man, that mask looks ruff.
Ahem...
To say the least, Badd's robe was extremely elaborate.
After a hip toss, Badd slammed the Dog.
The Dog came back with a hip toss followed by a dropkick.
Next, he converted a crucifix into a sunset flip for 2.
Long then got up on the apron so the Dog dropkicked Badd into him.
When the Dog focused on Long on the floor, Badd snuck around the ring post and clotheslined him.
He then made the Dog taste the steel railing. It must have tasted like the Broadway chicken at Alexander's Tavern.
Back in the ring, Badd gave the Dog a cross corner whip, but the Dog leaped to the second turnbuckle yet missed a cross body block.
Badd then mounted the top turnbuckle, hooked a sunset flip, and got 2.
As Badd tried to remove the Dog's mask, the Dog countered with a jawbreaker.
Badd came back with a high knee but missed a left.
Immediately, the Dog hooked a belly-to-back suplex before hitting a spinning heel kick.
He then delivered a back drop, mounted the top turnbuckle, and hit a cross body block.
Before a pin could be made, Long entered the ring.
Nick Patrick then called for the bell disqualifying Badd.

After the match, the Dog prevents Long from removing the mask and delivers a lariat. Badd then CLOCKS the Dog sending him between the ropes to the floor. Isn't that animal abuse? Call the authorities! Regardless, with Windham in the main event, the Dog's identity remains a "mystery."

Backstage, Bischoff attempts to interview Hyatt in the women's locker room. Meanwhile, the locker room attendant brings flowers to Missy and reads a card signed by Hyatt's flavor-of-the-month Jason Hervey. As Bischoff discovers that Hyatt's in the shower, he scares the bejeezus out of her. A leopard may not change its spots, but Hyatt's hair is currently brown. Nevertheless, she tosses her shampoo at him to shoo him away and yells "peeping tom." I guess turnabout is fair play. Welcome to WCW, Bischoff.

For those unaware, Black Blood was portrayed by Billy Jack Haynes.
Instead of bringing bears to the ring, Josh brought four blonde bombshells.
On the flip side, Black Blood brought his battle axe.

Not THAT kind of battle axe!
When Black Blood tossed Josh outside the ring, the heels nailed him before tossing him back in.
He then tossed Josh to the babyface side of the ring, and they tossed him back in without incident.
After Josh gave Black Blood a hip toss, he followed with a dropkick.
A double axe handle then sent Black Blood on the heel side of the ring. As you would expect, they gave Black Blood a breather and slowly tossed him back in.
As Josh gave Black Blood a cross corner whip, he delivered a leg sweep followed by a log roll.

Again, Josh knocked Black Blood out of the ring, but this time he landed on the babyface side. With some resistance by the heels, Black Blood returned unscathed.
He then came back with Snake Eyes and guillotined Josh using the top rope.
Upon removing Josh's flannel shirt, Black Blood delivered a knee lift.
He then nailed Josh sending him to the babyface side of the ring. When the babyfaces gave Josh a breather, the heels came around to protest. HA!
With Josh on the apron, Black Blood suplexed him in.
Meanwhile, a brawl between the babyfaces and heels broke out at ringside.
Black Blood then hit a leg drop but ate boot on a second attempt.
As Josh gave Black Blood a cross corner whip, he ate boot on his follow-through.
While another riot broke out at ringside, Black Blood hit a German suplex.
He then tried to use his axe, but Rhodes nailed him in the leg with Josh's axe handle.
Immediately, Josh hooked an inside cradle.
1-2-3.
Josh won.

Summary: The action outside the ring spawned quite a reaction from the Baltimore faithful despite the rather run-of-the-mill lumberjack match. Tom, what did you overhear Black Blood whisper to Rhodes?

Prior to the next match, Bischoff interviews Sullivan with Gang who cuts a promo on El Gigante. Like the Clash, Sullivan forgot to brush his hair after removing his Great Wizard mask. I guess vanity isn't one of his strong suits.

During his entrance, El Gigante brought four little people with him.
As the little people taunted both Gang and Sullivan, a comedy match broke out.
I guess that's better than these guys attempting a wrestling match.
When Gang tried to escape, El Gigante caught and tossed him over the top rope into the ring.
He then missed a clothesline yet delivered a hip toss.
Upon giving Gang a cross corner whip, he came up empty on his follow-through.
Gang then mounted the second turnbuckle and hit a clothesline.
Remarkably, El Gigante still didn't leave his feet.
Gang then appropriated a wrench from Sullivan to attack El Gigante behind referee Bill Alfonso's back.
While Gang distracted Alfonso, Sullivan hammered El Gigante with the wrench.
Gang then hit the 747 but only got 2. Also, El Gigante's kick-out sent Gang between the ropes to the floor.
Next, Gang guillotined him using the top rope.
He then mounted the top turnbuckle, but El Gigante caught and slammed him down to the mat.
After a back elbow, he gave Gang a cross corner whip followed by a shot to the midsection.
He then delivered a vertical suplex as Sullivan mounted the top turnbuckle. Impressive!
Wisely, El Gigante saw, caught, and crotched Sullivan.
He then gave Gang and Sullivan a double noggin knocker and applied the claw to Sullivan.
After Gang hit El Gigante with a double axe handle, he procured some powder from Sullivan.
He then tried to toss it, but El Gigante kicked it in Gang's face.
Upon clotheslining Gang from behind, El Gigante pinned him.

We then revisit SuperBrawl when Koloff nailed Sting followed by the aftermath. We then revisit WCW Pro when Koloff attacked Sting prior to an eight-man tag match (aired 6/8, taped 5/6). Lastly, we revisit Clash XV when Koloff attacked Sting with a chain.

After they brawled in the ring, both wrestlers spilled outside.
Sting then guillotined Koloff using the steel railing twice.
Next, he made Koloff taste the steel railing. It must have tasted like Dr. Thompson's short rib sandwich at Maisy's.
Back in the ring, Sting gave Koloff the ten-top-turnbuckle count-along.
He then touched two corners before Koloff stopped him.
After giving Sting a clothesline with the chain, Koloff took Sting outside the ring and made him taste the steel railing. Waiter, could you give the bleached blond guy a House of Cards please?
He then made a second attempt, but Sting blocked and rammed him again. Um, waiter, one more thing...could you give the bald guy impersonating a Lithuanian some Billy Murphy's spicy coleslaw please?
With the ring post between them, Sting yanked on the chain causing Koloff to HIT THE POLE.
Koloff came back with a chain-wrapped elbow drop. Innovative!
Upon giving Sting two more, he missed a fourth one.
Sting then noticed the location of the chain and crotched Koloff with it. YEE-OUCH!
As Koloff touched three corners, Sting stopped his momentum.
While Koloff held a bear hug, each wrestler touched two corners.
Koloff then sent Sting down US-301 with an uppercut down near Waldorf.
To ensure both wrestlers sang soprano at karaoke after the show, Sting performed his Andrew Golota impersonation.

They then touched the third corner simultaneously, but Koloff hit the Russian sickle.
As both wrestlers lunged toward the fourth corner, Koloff beat Sting by an eye lash.
Koloff won.

Summary: Sting's charisma and each wrestler's copious use of the chain were the only worthy portions of the match. Tom, could you chime in on this one?

After the match, Sting gives Koloff an atomic drop and crotches him with the chain. At this point, I'm certain that Koloff's vocal range could rival MIljenko Matijevic from Steelheart.

As the cage lowers, a tremendous "We Want Flair" chant emits from the Baltimore faithful.

Match 10 for the vacant WCW World title (cage): Barry Windham versus WCW US Champion the “Total Package” Lex Luger

For those of you who have followed my reflections for a while, I have covered all of the big encounters between Flair and Luger (e.g. Battle of the Belts III, Starrcade '88, WrestleWar '90). Luger could not beat Flair and win the title. Believe it or not, Luger's turn to beat Flair was supposed to occur at this show.
Also, before I forget, as of this show, Flair still possessed the WCW World title belt because Herd hadn't paid Flair his $25,000 deposit plus interest for it. Instead, WCW modified the PWF title belt. Insert your own joke here.

During Windham's entrance, WCW misspelled his name on the graphic (I.e. Windam). D'oh!
Another LOUD chant of "We Want Flair" rang out before the bell rang.
After Luger delivered a hip toss, Windham leap-frogged and dropkicked him.
He then attempted a slam, but Luger countered with an inside cradle for 2.
As a smattering of the Baltimore faithful chanted "Nature Boy," Luger slammed Windham but missed an elbow drop.
Windham then reversed an Irish whip and delivered a back drop.
When he attempted a vertical suplex, Luger blocked it and delivered one of his own.
Windham then slammed Luger and attempted the figure-four leg lock to no avail.
After Luger gave Windham an atomic drop, he hooked a sleeper.
Windham escaped, leap-frogged, and hooked Luger with his own sleeper.
To break the hold, Luger used momentum to send Windham face-first into the second turnbuckle.
Luger then hit a DDT for 2.
As Luger mounted the top turnbuckle, Windham caught and slammed him down to the mat.
He then delivered a knee drop for 2.
When Windham mounted the top turnbuckle, he missed the big elbow.
Luger then delivered a back drop followed by a series of clotheslines for 2.
Upon hitting a back elbow, Luger got another 2.
He then gave Windham a powerslam and signaled for the Torture Rack.
As he hooked the Torture Rack, Windham used the cage to escape. Clever!
He then gave Luger a belly-to-back suplex but couldn't capitalize.
Luger came back, placed Windham atop the top turnbuckle, attempted a superplex, but Windham shoved him down.
From the top turnbuckle, Windham hit a lariat.
He then gave Luger another back drop followed by another lariat.
Next, he slammed Luger for 2.
Upon mounting the top turnbuckle again, Windham hit a missile dropkick for another 2.
Suddenly, Harley Race and Mr. Hughes came to ringside.
As Windham confronted Hughes, Race gave Luger some instruction.
Luger then put a knee into Windham's back and delivered a piledriver.
1-2-3.
WE HAVE A NEW CHAMPION!

After the match, Hughes and Race enter the cage as Race holds Luger's arm up in victory.

Match 11 mixed gender/cage): The "Dog-faced Gremlin" Rick Steiner & Missy Hyatt versus the "Enforcer" Arn Anderson & Paul E. Dangerously

Tom, what are your thoughts on Missy?

Since you're both Floridians, I'll let that one slide, Tom.
Before the match began, the Hardliners came to ringside and abducted Hyatt. What scoundrels!
Therefore, this match changed from mixed gender to handicap match.
When Arn attempted a leap frog, Rick caught and powerslammed him.
He then turned his attention to Uncle Paul, but Arn put a knee into Rick's back.
As Rick held Arn in a bear hug, Uncle Paul mounted the top turnbuckle and nailed Rick with the cell phone.
Arn then removed one of Uncle Paul's boots, mounted the second turnbuckle, leaped, but ate a Steinerline.
With Arn incapacitated, Rick slammed the extremely terrified Uncle Paul and followed with a Steinerline.
1-2-3.
Rick won.

Summary: So you're asking why this match was the main event? With Luger's heel turn in the semi-main, my guess is that WCW didn't want to send the Baltimore fans home on a sour note. With Windham in the title match and Scott Steiner injured, this match was doomed to fail. More on this in a bit.

Conclusion: Two cage matches and a chain match with zero blood? A mixed gender match converted to a handicap match? What gives? Credit the Maryland State Athletic Commission for putting the kibosh to those situations. While I'm certain Hyatt's redemption for Uncle Paul's abuse would have made for a satisfying ending to the show, certain people didn't want you to see it.

I'm endeavoring a guess that most of the 5500 paid purchased their tickets prior to 7/1. Having said that, they sought to witness Flair's passing of the torch moment. Instead, they got a controversial finish to a merely mediocre World title match. In addition, WCW tried to force-feed several gimmick matches down their throat, but the Baltimore faithful's enthusiasm for them barely resonated. Despite his age, Flair's ring presence, charisma, and wrestling repertoire made him one of if not the main box office draw for WCW. Without him, the Baltimore faithful didn't get their money's worth.

Due to several matches hovering between awful and mediocre, I can see why most wrestling fans consider this show to be WCW's worst PPV. Since I haven't seen most of the WCW PPVs from 2000-01, I can't deem this show the worst ever, but without a single truly worthwhile match, it's definitely the worst show up until this point.